This is not a love story.

Sometimes I feel as if my life is an alternate version of 500 days of summer.

This hits way too close to home. 

I feel like people take ten steps forward and then fifty back and you just end up heart broken or confused or lonely or just a clusterfuck of emotions that you can't decipher. That's where I'm at. 

Why can't people just... Be simple? Why can't feelings not be messy? Clean cut sandwiches instead of hot wings for dinner. I guess that would be boring. Whatever. 

If I've learned anything in life it's that once you stop trying, what's the point? Something inside shuts off and you just can't care anymore, at least not in the moment. Each moment is fleeting, so hey, that may change, but in the now? Trying is tiresome and I don't sleep enough for this bullshit. 

People are just stupid. Sometimes I wonder what life is like in other places. I wonder what the people are like and if they're friendly, if they keep their promises, if they make an effort. Or if they're just the same untrustworthy selfish losers I know the human race to be. No offense, people. But humanity as a whole kinda blows. 

Maybe I'll just leave this place. Maybe it'll be better. I can start over as my own best friend.

I told myself I'd be more positive this year. Maybe this is a start.